Blog post, Daniel Pink

Symphony – Well Structured Magic

What does that word mean to you? Symphony orchestra comes to mind. The blending of sounds from different instruments to create melody and variation and sound that move people to heights of joy and sadness, music that tells a story, draws a picture, creating a perfect mixture of the right notes and volume. Symphony is like design with sound.

A synonym for symphony is harmonious. I think Daniel Pink intended it to be more than harmonious sounds. From his book I get the impression he is talking about harmony and symphony as experienced in sight and sound … pleasing to the eye and the ear, to the heart and the body and the mind.

I like the concept of symphony. It is well structured magic. There is a formula for writing a symphony. A symphony is an extended piece of music for orchestra, especially one in sonata form. Usually there are four movements in a symphony. They are played by symphonic orchestras, with sections of string, brass, woodwind, and percussion instruments. the sounds of the different instruments are organized to create beautiful melodic sounds. There is structure and sometimes, although not always, music and not noise is produced. if you have ever listened to the warm up of a symphony or a rehearsal you know things are not always performance grade. Maybe that is what Pink was trying to get across.. the idea that practice is necessary to create beautiful music together… that we need to work together to find our sound, our contribution to the work and the world. Working together we can generate the same kind of well structured magic as symphonic orchestras do.

That is what happens in PULSE conversations … well structured magic. There is a formula. There are movements ( four). There are sections represented by the roles being played. We follow the score or process…and we create harmony.

How do you create symphony and how to you learn to strengthen your ability to do that in your life? You listen for it. You identify it and its elements and then you work at recreating it. That is almost exactly what I said to our participants in this weeks PULSE training. Relax and listen so that you can hear the patterns … the melody… in the conversation. You will know when things are off key or tempo and you will begin to understand what needs to happen to create the balance and the harmony, the blend of sounds, words and actions that align to make symphony.

Empathy

The E in DESTINY is for Empathy. It is another characteristic that Daniel Plink is predicting we will need in this new world of ours. Empathy is a skill that can be developed and it is also something that we learn in our family of origin. It is often confused with sympathy, but feeling sorry for someone is not the same as feeling what they are feeling… working to understand the world from their perspective. Getting over into the other persons shoes takes an ability to let go of your own perspective as the only possible one. Some people get stuck there. They can’t seem to grasp that the world is not as they see it and experience it. They don’t know that other people experience it differently.

I think that is why teaching the Enneagram is so important. It teaches people to value what they are not. It creates the awareness of different perspectives which explain the different reactions and responses that people have to the same stimulus. That is my sociological bent on the Enneagram as a tool for looking at the social struggler and the social behaviour in conversation with others. You can teach people to be aware of the differences. Is someone coming toward you or moving with you or moving away? Are they oriented to the past, the present or the future? Their direction and orientation will help you determine what they are looking for in the social acts like conversation.

Knowing the Enneagram helps increase the likelihood that you will develop a sense of empathy and an ability to relate in a deeper more meaningful way with others. It allows you to see the world from that perspective by practicing that very skill.

I remember an observation exercise in my PhD program where we were asked to describe an object from one position in the room. The task was to describe exactly what you saw and not what you knew was there. Then we moved to a new position and again described just what we saw. It was a powerful exercise which I repeat in our classes but we look at a situation rather than an object and we physically place ourselves around the circle of the Enneagram describing the situation from the perspective we are standing on before moving to another position and making a different assessment from the new perspective. It is a powerful exercise to improve our skills related to empathy.

Daniel Pink talks a lot about why empathy is important in our new world and about how it is a right brain activity. The facts on the left side of the brain being analyzed or experienced on the right side to create a connection with another human being and their experiences is not something you can out source or ask a computer to do. It is a human experience and those who are good at it will thrive according to Pink. It is something that PULSE professionals do.

Design

Design is the D in DESTINY which is my pneumonic for remembering Daniel Pink’s strategies for developing a “Whole New Mind.” Design is about learning how to pay attention. Pink invites us to look at our favourite kitchen utensil and design a better one. Just noticing how things have both form and function and how one compliments the other is a step toward understanding the importance of design. How many design have you experienced of the concept related to chair? There is no chairness in the word and lately in our world the things we sit on do not always come with four legs, 2 arms and a back.

Design requires both sides of your brain to work together. To work, what ever you are designing needs the left side of your brain to evaluate the functionality of the thing. To look good and have aesthetic appeal what ever you are designing needs your creative right brain to see and understand the form.

Just thinking about design lets you look at the world differently. In our world there is more emphasis on the integration of form and function and so we have beautiful cars, homes and even coffee makers. Everything we buy has a style that suits us. We choose from endless varieties of everything. Where once, when you needed a toaster you had little or no choice at your department store, we now have isles lined with choice or toaster to fit the form and function that you are looking for. We have signature styles and preferences that define us and are defined by us.

Think about what you like and why. Why this pair of shoes and not that one. Why this washing machine and not that one. What are the consistent themes in your life? What are your colours and shapes… the ones that recur in your life? For instance I rarely choose flowers as a pattern. I prefer clean lines and geometric shapes. That goes for the clothes that I wear and the home furnishings I select.

Play with design. Notice it in the department store, on the avenue and while visiting show homes. Notice shapes and colours and contours and space Use the right side of your brain to appreciate the form and the left side of the brain to evaluate the function.

DESTINY – Daniel Pink

I have been traveling from Calgary to Edmonton and back a lot. I try to listen to good music or a good book on the road. it makes the three-hour trip quicker somehow. This last trip I dug out a set of CDs from 2007. Daniel Pink’s “A Whole New Mind” is a wonderful exploration of the left and right hemispheres. He talks about what we need to survive in this high touch and high concept age and he outlines seven sets of attitudes, skills and Knowledge that each of us will require to be successful in this new world we are living in. Being who I am and wanting to remember the seven items in order to share them with others I have re-ordered them and renames a couple to come up with an easier to remember version…

Design

Empathy

Symphony

Transcendence

Imagination

Narrative

Yin and Yang

I will talk about each of them in the blog entries that follow this one. Because I didn’t talk notes in the car and I will have to listen again to the book in a note taking environment to comment on them.

I do want to comment on the tone of the book today. It was published in 2007. Daniel Pink’s voice is on the CDs reading the unabridged version of the book. His tone is hopeful and inspired and contains none of the post 2008 concern we have all learned to live with. I was fascinated by this difference in emotion about a future that seemed to be full of endless growth and possibility. It was a reminder that things can change suddenly or they can take 5 years.

By the way … I am retiring from PULSE. I am not leaving my blog but I have found that there are others who can manage the PULSE programs. Marjorie has accepted this month’s assignment and I am confident she will provide excellent instruction to our new PULSE professionals.

I will continue to write and coach from time to time. I will also accept guest appearances from time to time but I have decided that it is time for me to free myself to finish the books I have started and the ones that are still swimming in my thoughts waiting for a chance to escape onto the page or screen or drawing board.

It was a combination of the re-reading (listening to) Daniel Pink’s wonderful book and my time in bookkeeping class that brought me to a place where I can say goodbye to PULSE. Like a child who has grown and is moving out. I believe there are PULSE influences all around the world and that people like you – PULSE professionals – will continue to use it. Write me a note to let me know how you are using it and please keep reading the blogs. I do appreciate the feedback.

Take good CARE. Curiousity, Appreciation, Responsiveness, and Empathy are your friends in conversation. That’s another new acronym. Hope you like it.

Right and Left PULSE

AS I look for new ways to explain the advantages of the PULSE frame over other aids to conversation I am struck by the consistency of thought leaders around the significance of an approach like the PULSE approach that incorporates, in a deliberate way, the elements essential for good clear communication. Leaders do their work in Conversation. It is often assumed that they know how to have successful conversations by the time they get to a position that demands leadership skills. PULSE is a core competency for leaders and anyone else who does their work in conversation. As a PULSE professional you are at a distinct advantage because you understand the nuances and the nuts and bolts of productive, generative conversation.

We are all of two minds – left and right. There are two approaches to most things…. okay maybe three. Daniel Pink, in his book “A Whole New Mind” writes about the differences of each side of the brain and the necessity of a cooperative bridge between them in order for us to continue to thrive in our modern world. The book was written in 2007 and listening to it again on my drive yesterday I heard the optimism of the time before 2008. I was struck by the optimism as well as the wisdom of what he was saying about our modern world and the needs for BOTH hemispheres of the brain to work together in order to make the changes, the adjustments necessary for the human race to build or rebuild a world that works for everyone.

The other thing that struck me was the way that the PULSE Frame and the PULSE training work to join the functions of both hemisphere. If you are PULSE professional you already know how to use both sides of your brain to meet the needs of your clients. The right side of the brain is where empathy and story reside. This side represents the creative, interpretive skills we gain as we learn about PULSE and GHOST and POWER and HEART. The left side is more analytically and logical and is best served with the structure of the PULSE frame as it moves through time from past to present to future, using a script to ensure that no step is missed. So PULSE represents a whole brain conversation. It considers text AND context in ways that lead to sustainable resolution.

AS we move into a future we can experience through language (left brain) and images (right brain) the PULSE Frame serves all of us well. WE can use our ” Whole New Minds”.

If you need a refresher or would like to learn about PULSE for the first time please sign up for our webinar series – 90 minute seminars you can attend from your own computer. May 1st and 3rd and May 8th and 10th at 10:00 AM. If you are interested email nancylove@pulseinstitute.com for more information.

First Day Back

Today was my first day back at PULSE. I have been on sabbatical working with Parks Canada for a year now. It was different not to rise at 5 am and be at work in downtown Calgary by 7am, taking meetings with people in the east who were musch wider awake than you. It was different to have time in my day to think about what I might do the rest of this week and next and for the rest of my life. It is liberating and frightening all at the same time. It seems that in my life that is often the case. I am most frightened when I am most free.

I had meetings today to reestablish PULSE connections and redefine relationships. It was very nice to be back.

A question that arose while we were chatting this morning was around a definition for a PULSE professional. I have said before that my goal now is to serve those who have had PULSE training and would like some individual or team coaching on how to use this valuable and universal tool for conversations. But what does it mean to be a PULSE professional? When I say that or when I hear it the meaning I attribute relates to a set of attitudes, skills and knowledge that together mean you can calm a room just by entering it. If you are dealing with a PULSE professional you are dealing with someone who understands the dynamics of human behaviour in a way that makes them skillful in leading conversations for sustainable change. It is the sociological approach to defining behaviours and how to change them for positive changes that makes PULSE different. If you are a mediator and not a PULSE Professional you will have a different sense of what is necessary in a conversation for everyone to feel honoured and for outcomes or plans of actions to be sustainable. If you are a coach and not a PULSE professional your coach approach may lack the wisdom that comes from familiarity with the D.O. points, the sociological construct that defines and explains and can predict the human response in conversation. If you work with people and your methods include words and conversation and you are a PULSE professional you see the conversation differently and you understand the essential elements of quality conversations for change.

I noticed this in my work with Parks. I could calm a room just by walking in. I could calm a client in very short time no the phone. It was not just the attitude because a caring attitude without the knowledge or confidence to help will not have the same calming effect. It was not just the skills because alone skills are missing the necessary compassion. It was not the knowledge of theory alone. Theory informs everything PULSE including the practice but with only the knowledge of how good conversations work and not the appreciative attitude or the skillful use of language the impact is reduced. the right combination of Attitude, Skills and Knowledge creates PULSE Professionals. They are people who listen well, assess the situation well, know what to do and how to do it and who lead people to new decisions everyday with gentle, honest, open, specific talk.

I created a poll on linked in about PULSE professionals. It is in a group Marjorie and I started a long time ago for PULSE Professionals. If you have PULSE training or you are interested in what makes someone a PULSE professional please join the group and enter the dialog with us. Help us build the definition.

And by the way… I am looking for work.

Transitions

So I am transitioning back to my life as a consultant in the next couple of weeks. It really never ended. I just had one boss instead of many for the last year. My work is still about being a conflict resources for people and helping them in and out of conflict which ever is appropriate.

I am looking forward to being back out there. And as Randy Bachman has been heard to say …” When the curtain comes down and I looking for work again.” He might say “unemployed” I don’t think he is and neither am I. AND I will be looking for work.

What can I do? Many things. I can consult and coach and train and mediate and facilitate and I can do all of them quite well. Lots of experience from which I have learned what not to do as well as what to do, allows me to say that with confidence. I am good at what I do.

I can also write and I will continue to create information in the written form. It is my way of sharing with others that which I have learned from them. There are a number of writing projects in the hopper that will definitely keep me busy if not employed in the short term.

What would I like to do? Help people. If my expertise in managing relationships, the space between two or more people, might help you… let me know. I enjoy the contribution that occurs when my expertise fills a gap for someone else. Passing on the how to of organizational health is important to me. Why should anyone have to make the same mistakes I may have made?

Coaching, Consulting, Writing, Facilitating Conversations for Change.

What will I do? I am open to the possibilities.

What kind of coach are you?

Thanks to all of you who commented on the trip North of 60. no other blog has brought out the stories in others like that one did. It got me thinking about how people connect with what others are experiencing.

Recently I was asked to renew my membership in ICF and the questions I had to answer included “What kind of coach are you?” I wanted to pick a “A damn good one” but it wasn’t’ an option and neither was “Conflict Coach”. It is a funny term any way. What is a conflict coach? Someone who coaches you in and out of conflict? I guess that’s right. It is what I do. When people don’t know what to do in a conflict situation I help them get into it and then out again. Anyway the ICF doesn’t have it on the list of options for “What kind of coach are you?” So am I a business coach? a leadership coach? a relationship coach? hmmmm …

I am the kind of coach that helps you make a difference. I am the kind of coach who encourages you to increase the likelihood of success in what ever you are striving to achieve. I help you manage conflict, giving you skills and confidence to create a change in your world.

How does that sound? I need some feedback here.

I also started an on line program … a pilot for coaches to be coached to improve their business. I am so looking forward to working with Yvonne Silver. She is helping me get clear about my coaching business which has evolved over this past year as I was on sabbatical from PULSE. I like the format of the on line coaching pilot and I like that Yvonne and I both of chapters in an upcoming book – Stepping Stones for Success. Watch for more information on that coming soon.

So as my term at PCA winds down and I begin to pick up the threads of PULSE watch for a level one training opportunity in May and more opportunities to engage me as a coach for your conflict situations. If you need to get into conflict and don’t know how OR you are in it and need some help getting out give me a call. 1-888-882-8804 I’ll be available April 8th, 2013.

North of 60 – I made it

It’s hard to believe but here I am in Inuvik, Northwest Territories. Even better … I am close to Tuktoyuktuk. I taught Canadian geography for many years, sharing the arctic with students but never having actually been here. How lucky am I?? It takes seven hours north from Calgary through Edmonton, Yellowknife and Norman Wells to get here. Its as far or farther than Hawaii is west and Toronto is east of Calgary.

I am on the MacKenzie River near the Arctic Ocean. It’s another pinch me moment. The temperature is hovering around minus thirty. I am grateful for my new parka and long johns. The taxi driver who brought me from the airport was a great ambassador for the town. He’s been here twenty years. He says I should come back in the summer of course but that there is a laid back atmosphere that is comfortable for him. He is not interesting to returning to a city where people are always in a rush.

I can’t help but compare the people I have seen here with the wonderful people I work with in the Virgin Islands. These people are wearing more clothes but they are happy and relaxed and family oriented. The people in the restaurant last night were talking about everyday things that they accomplish in these extreme weather conditions.

Today I will get out and see more of the town when the sun comes up. Its 9 ish now and just starting to get light. More tomorrow.

Busyness Business

Have you ever had your mind so full of things you could be doing that you cannot function. I am already gone to the next thing the second that things get a little bit repetitive or boring. I have changed offices and homes over the past month and I am exhausted.

Moving requires movement. I feel physically tired and strained in every part of my body. I feel emotionally taxed by all of the demands to relive the past as we sort through our belongings. I feel intellectually challenged by the endless decision making that tires me to the bone. Head, heart and body challenged, taxed and strained.

And yet there is this excitement in me about the possibilities that are opening because of the move. I see a live that is simpler and free and warmer and fun. I see a place for everything even if everything is not in place yet. I see an organized deliberate life that uses the tools and stuff we have. Get out the good dishes, the raclette, the good wine and scotch, the favourite clothes, the inspirational books. Those things and experiences that have been hiding in the back of our closets or on the top shelve are so much more accessible after a move. If only I had the energy and the time to truly enjoy them. But wait! I do!

Some times I have to remind myself that any situation you find yourself in is temporary. You can slow it down or speed it up or change direction. You are in the drivers seat. Do what you can to make it work for you and watch how a shift in attitude changes things more quickly than anything else.

I am a busy person and I enjoy the business of busyness … some days more than others.