Life is what you make it…
It’s been more than a month since I sat down at the computer to write. A few things have happened. My car … dear Scarlette … is still in the shop after a very weird turn of events on a highway near here. My dad is still in hospital after almost three weeks of roller coaster life and death experiences. My very talented and dedicated daughter injured her leg just before dance competition season. Life is like that sometimes…
I am confident that we will all turn a corner this week. My daughter will get the rest her body needs to heal. Dad is scheduled to be transferred to a rehab hospital after his miraculous recovery, one a lot closer to home. Scarlette is getting the care and attention she needs to be as good as new. And I will be back at the key board writing…
Sometimes it is difficult to understand the patterns in your life. We hear that things happen in threes. Do we believe that because it happens? or does it happen because we believe it? I have never quite figured that out. If I change my beliefs can I change my life? Some people thing so. The power of positive thinking has become a field of study and the evidence suggests that we can change the course of our lives by changing our thinking. I like the concepts but I really dislike the implication that our present thinking is creating our present circumstance. Sometimes stuff just happens.
I have noticed a pattern in my own thinking that I would like to change. Excitement- anticipation – expectations – disappointment. Too often I get to disappointment. It’s become a pattern for me .. one I desperately want to change. I want to generate excitement, anticipation, hard work and success. I want to feel the joy of a job well done. I want to allow myself to experience the thrill of accomplishment without the self doubt of how much better it could have been if only … I want to stop letting myself down and punishing myself for NOT contributing enough, not being good enough or smart enough or …. fill in the blank. i want to be sure that my thoughts, sometimes gloomy and dark, are not the sabotaging culprit getting in my way.
It has been a difficult month. Did I somehow contribute to that? Am I losing my mind or my perspective? I think I am.
I have lots of tools that I can use to self correct. I am the author of more than 100 blogs on how to deal with life. I am well educated and usually confident. I know what to do. I’m just not doing it right now… Maybe tomorrow.
