BEACHs, PULSE Conversations, PULSE Enneagram, Social Exchange, UVI PULSE webinars

Wednesday’s UVI-PULSE Webinar

This week on Wednesday I will be doing a webinar for the University of the Virgin Islands. You can register on their website. UVI-PULSE. This week I am going to talk more about the nine different approaches to the world that can be learned by studying the Enneagram.

I think it will be of interest to anyone who wants to develop their understanding of the nine positions on the Enneagram circle and how you can use the PULSE grid to find out where someone is at the moment. I will also talk about how you can predict where they might go and how you can help people move when they get stuck.

It should be fun. There will also be a short ebook available to people who register.

Any exposure to the cultures of the nine points is help full. It can take only an hour to know how they work and a life time to fully understand. I always say start anywhere and go everywhere when you are learning a complex concept like the BEACHs. I hope you join us to expand your knowledge and add to the conversation.

10 Seconds

At my dad’s retirement home there is an elevator. Once you step in, the door waits 10 seconds before it closes. somedays that 10 seconds feels like an anxious eternity. Other days it is a quiet vacation from the hectic world. I always find it is interesting how time is relative to your state of mind. Most of the residence push the ‘close door’ button immediately unwilling to wait for the doors to close on their own. I always wonder why. Is it because they are anxious to get back to their rooms? Is it the seemingly natural impatience that I have noticed comes with age … or at least for my dad? Or is it that time has become precious and waiting for an elevator door is not how they want to spend any of the 10 second timeframes they have left on this earth?

I like to wait for the door to close on its own. I like to notice my own state during that time. Where does my head go? I take the time to examine my own state of anxiety or calm. I find it helpful. Where am I? Not physically, although it is a good reminder of that. Where am I emotionally? How connected am I to my surroundings and the people there? And what has transpired since I was last waiting in the elevator for the door to close?

Life is always about time and place. Take time in what ever place you find yourself. You will see that the next time you find yourself in that exact place, it will be like the time between visits has disappeared.

SHARP as a Marble

Just a brief note today on the importance of measuring your wellbeing from time to time. How well are you feeling on each of the five intelligence measures?

Intellectually are you feeling SHARP? What is your sense of whether or not your mind is working at capacity today?

Emotionally are you feeling HAPPY? What emotions are you aware of and how light or heavy is your heart today?

Relationally are you feeling INDEPENDENT? What level of control do you sense with your relationships today?

Physically are you feeling FIT? What is your sense of your level of health and fitness today?

Spiritually are you feeling TRUSTING? What sense do you have that you can trust others and the universe today?

Keep this list on your fingers and remind yourself to check in from time to time. If you are feeling low in one measure and higher in another focus on what you can do from the higher measure to help increase the lower one.

Take Good Care.

A Whale of a Party

Donna and I went on a Whale Watching sail the other day. We left the bay at around 3:00 in the afternoon and motored north. The Biologist on board, Jeff, was great. He had all the facts about whales and their lives. He answered all of the questions we had and then we began to see the wonderful creatures.

Words cannot describe the feeling you get when a whale shows you his tail. It is somewhere between gratitude and excitement, awe and appreciation. The animals we saw where gigantic. We were lucky enough to witness around 20 whales at the surface. Spouts all around us but in particular two whales traveling together gave us quite a show. They would surface and show their tails for a while and then disappear.

The crew would begin calling them and encouraged us to do the same. Suddenly they appeared at the back of the boat about 20 yards off the stern, showed their backs and then their tails in turn. MAGNIFICENT and a little scary. They were way bigger than the boat.

We were all smiles and joy. The crew said it was the best experience they had had for a long time and they were all feeling like we had our money’s worth when our whales suddenly reappeared at the front of the boat. Could have been two different whales but the tails, which are like fingerprints, looked very much the same. Again they passed so close to the boat you felt you could reach out and touch them. Even the crew were high fiving each other.

What an experience!!

It was a magical time. The crew was excellent. Our fellow travelers were appropriately impressed and the whales were accomodating. They answered the call and they stayed and partied with us. You almost wanted to invite them aboard for one of the delicious Maitais.

Here comes the sun ….

If you are of a certain age you automatically sing “do do do do” after you hear “Here Comes the Sun” and “I say…It’s alright.”

The old Beatles classic is a great tune with wonderful lyrics. I was actually working out yesterday with my phone plugged into my ears and my music on when I heard it again for the first time. It felt like home and in this very sunny place it felt like the right song to sing. Lines like “The ice is slowly melting” could mean getting out of the cold or it could mean that you are thawing out after a long time protecting yourself … like in the movie Frozen.

It was a powerful reminder of the power of music in my life and the wonderful emotions that can be triggered by a song. Tears came to my eyes as I felt the meaning of the song. Things are looking up. They are getting better. The sun is coming out and it is alright.

Of course that song was followed by “Fool on the Hill” and I wondered what meaning I should take from that as I stood on a hill looking out over the rolling hills of the Big Island. Keep humble!!

Aloha … I am LOVE

I saw a hoody yesterday at a store here on the Big Island of Hawaii that said “I am LOVE” on the back of it. Unfortunately they didn’t have my size or I would be walking around with my name advertised on my back in big bold letters. I am Love and I do love aloha.

Being back here in January is great. It is beautiful. I am looking out onto a golf course with Cook Pines and BIG wild turkeys and Nene geese that look a lot like Canada geese everywhere. Yesterday the male turkeys put on a fantastic show for us and the hens were chasing each other around. I am not sure what that was about but it looked like they all turned on one for some reason.

Yesterday we drove up to the north shore where the small town of HAWI is. It was about an hour and a half loop and on the way back we were climbing for about 15 miles through ranch land with cattle and horses to a summit of 3456 feet Then the road descended rather rapidly over a five mile stretch back to the town of Waimea. The sun was setting and from that elevation it was quite a show. The VOG in the air from the volcano turned the sun into a red ball in the sky that hung over the rugged lava flows of years gone by. It was other worldly.

I might have to actually turn on the TV and see what’s going on with the volcano. It is hazy already this morning. This is the same volcano, Kilauea, who chased away the hurricanes this summer when I was here with the girls. Two hurricanes and two earth quakes in one week and it didn’t seem to faze anyone. After all we were still in paradise.

What makes this island so special is the diversity. From the volcano in the south and cattle ranching in the north, white and black sand beaches and moonscapes where the lava from old eruptions cover the earth. The snow on the top of Mauna Kea, which means white mountain in Hawaiian, has ski runs on it which we could see from our vantage point on the west coast yesterday and yet it was 27 degrees where we were.

The sun is shining and it promises to be another warm sunny day. Take care everyone.

Aloha from Waikaloa

I am back in Hawaii. I love it here. The weather is perfect. The food is good. Everything is good. It is truly paradise.

I figured out that I have been coming here at least once a year since 2003. In fact I was here a year ago and in August this year. It is not my second home but I am becoming quite familiar with all there is to know about the Big Island. Tonight we were at Roy’s for dinner. Wow. Always excellent food and great service.

WE also took a drive to HAWI at the north end of the island and drove back over the mountain through Parker Ranch territory. A little adventure to keep things interesting is often necessary. WE shopped at my favourite store … Tommy Bahamas and spent sometime at the pool.. All in all a great day.

Off to see more of the World

This week I am heading for the Barbados. My friend and I will be “Yachting, not Cruising” the islands south of there. These islands are all new to me and I am excited about adding to my list of places I have been. I INTEND to post often from aboard the ship but I am not sure about what kind of connectivity we will have so as with many intentions it may not be within my power to fulfill this one.

It’s been a crazy week getting ready to go. Hallowe’en is a special day in our family. My mum and dad got married on Hallowe’en in 1952. It would have been their 62nd anniversary. It is another first of annual events without mum and it was difficult. I am not looking forward to Christmas this year because it will be the first Christmas without her as well. I know you have all lost love ones and know the pain and confusion that you experience as you celebrate holidays with someone missing. It is a shared human experience, I know, but it feels very personal right now.

My mum’s mum died on Christmas Eve when I was 9. No Christmas goes by with out my mother reminding us how long she has been gone. I guess that responsibility will fall to me as have many others since she passed away. It is interesting being the oldest female in your family. There seem to be a lot of responsibilities that fall to you.

Enough about Christmas. First to the sunshine and clear blue waters to learn more about Bajans. I can already feel the healing sun on my skin and the warm breezes soothing my soul. Although I do intend to Blog I do not intend to work on the book while I am away. If I get inspired fine but usually I leave with visions of chapters edited or sections written and then I come home with less achieved than I had planned and I beat myself up. That takes the joy out of the trip. I am giving myself permission to relax and enjoy the trip, leaving my internal task master behind. I think it comes from years of travelling to beautiful places all over the US and the Caribbean for work but I need a break and I intend to take it.

Nine islands with beaches …. hmmmm one for each Region in my new book about mapping the space between us. Maybe I will take a camera. Maybe there is no escape when you have chosen to be a writer. Seeing more of the world means that you have more world to write about … when you get home. Permission to relax and enjoy granted.

I Write Everyday. Why can’t I finish a book???

So what shows up in my life lately are movies and invitations about story telling and writing. I am always fascinated about how what we focus on appears. I believe it is likely always there but we don’t necessarily see it until our attention is drawn by some inner need to complete something.

This weekend I watched a movie called Sunshine and Shadows. It is set in England and Tuscany. It is about a publisher who is also a fledgling writer who is assigned to find a writer who hasn’t written a book in more than 20 years and convince his to write again. I loved the story. It was funny and compassionate and well written. I also am a fan of Tuscany and the people there. the other movie I watched this weekend was Under the Tuscan Sun. I had seen that one before and just needed to watch a good story with a happy ending again to bolster my faith in humanity.

The line from the Sunshine and Shadows movie that has stayed with me is “Writing is hard work.” Why that is news to me I can’t really figure out. I know that writing is hard work. I also know that GETTING TO THE WRITING is harder for me. The two books that are in my head are heavy. I feel as if I am nine and a half months pregnant with twins. I can block time and set deadlines until the cows come home but it doesn’t really move the book along. I need help.

Suggestions???

Alberta and Cowboys

Today I drove from Edmonton to Canmore. That’s nothing new. I do it all the time . Today was different. It was a bright , crisp blue sky and the snow covered mountains were calling so I turned off Highway 2 and drove to Rocky Mountain House so that I could wander back through the foothills to Cochrane and take 1A into Canmore.

If you have ever done that drive you know the vistas are beyond spectacular. The Rockies are majestic and today you can see Mount Lougheed from Sundre. The road is mostly straight through the rolling hills and the small towns are so typically small town-ish. I saw one sign that offered hand crafted gun racks and sewing alterations in the same facility. It was a great day for a drive.

I was on what is known as the Cowboy Trail. I love cowboys and the idea of cowboys. The quiet confidence and humility that comes from working with animals on the land tells me that they learn something out there. There is a rugged individualism with a sense of down home manners and sensitivity that is likely a stereo type. It could also be a myth. Who cares. This is fantasy. What is for sure is that there is a mystique in those mountains, on those ranches and in those fields that you can’t really find anywhere else.

Today I was reminded of a question I was once asked by a teacher from Hong Kong. We were at a teachers of gifted children conference ( Not to be confused with a Gifted Teachers Conference) when the subject of attraction to the opposite sex came up. I walked into a conversation and was asked rather suddenly. “What kind of man do you find sexy?” I was a little taken aback because I hadn’t really thought about it but there it was just falling out of my mouth….”There is just SOMETHING about a cowboy…” I smiled in reply. The debate raged. Suits were sexier. Doctors in Lab coats. Fighter pilots. Sailors on the high seas. Oilmen. Academics. Everyone had an answer that worked for them. It was another example of the individual nature of humans in cultures.

Not sure why that conversation stayed with me but there was a raw emotion attached to it that has lingered. Driving through the beautiful Alberta Foothills today with the Rockies shining in the background, I thought of cowboys today and it made me smile. It always does.

Category : BEACHs